QUOTE OF THE DAY (OR MORE): "No, no. You don't understand. This is an '89 Calico. I'm pretty sure that exceeds the Kelly Blue Book value. The cat's totaled." --A comedian whose name I forget talking about a vet who presents a $3,000 bill for a 12-year-old cat

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Hello? Anyone there?


Hello?
Tap Tap Tap Tap.
Anyone still out there in blogland?
I am hereby certifiably the worst blog reader friend in the blogosphere. Not only have I not been blogging (with no paucity of material, either), but I haven't read any blogs. I'm so sorry, y'all.
I get in that crazy mode when life gets busy. It feels like I'm all hyped up on caffeine and I must accomplish 300 things at once every minute. I have no time to chat on the phone, let alone blog. I'm a bad, bad blogger. Guilt. guilt. guilt.
I can explain. Want a list?
- We've just unexpectedly bought our dream house. It fell into our laps and we jumped. This has led to all sorts of unplanned things that take up lots of time, such as the ho hum task of getting our house all cleaned out and ready to go on the market (hey - anyone looking for a house in the Baltimore area?). Yesterday I put out 9 (N I N E) huge trash bags of stuff for Purple Heart to pick up and take away from me... Remember over the summer (or was it spring break?) when the boys cleaned out their rooms? That was nothing. nada. zilch. zippo. I have cleaned out the basement. The finished part. The unfinished part. I have sold Tonka trucks. A plethora of Legos. I am selling a piano. I have filled bags with useless toys and puzzles my boys have outgrown. I have cleaned out the 11-year-old's room. With him. There were tears. There was yelling. But it's done. I have much more to do...
- We have been working on high school applications for the 13-year-old. It's time consuming and a lot of work. This is simultaneous with the house stuff.
- I have a full-time job. yup.
- I haven't written any articles for Examiner.com, and I feel guilty about that, too. Especially since it's MARATHON SEASON!!! wahoo! excuse me. sorry about that.
- Speaking of which, I have been training for the marathon that's on October 18th! Almost there. Can't skimp on the training now!
- I have a business trip to Germany next week which takes A LOT of preparation. Days of it.
ARRRGGHHHHH! again. k. excuse me. I'm even drinking decaf coffee.
So... since I'll be on a plane to Europe on Monday with 9 hours of peace and quiet, I thought I'd revisit some pointers for long flights.
Long flights ROCK. They are THE BOMB. (but only if your kids aren't with you). It's hours of uninterrupted peace and quiet. Except when the captain breaks in to announce that he's turned off the fasten seatbelt sign. No s**t, really? Thanks for that. Oh - and when they interrupt the MOVIE to announce a special CREDIT CARD DEAL. Yes - that happened to me on the way home from China once. Advertising is both ubiquitous and obnoxious these days.
Anyway. I digress. How surprising.
To make the most of your hours of peace and quiet on a long flight, you must follow these guidelines.
1. Under absolutely NO circumstances do you make friends with the person (or people, God forbid) sitting next to you. He or she may SEEM friendly at first, but inevitably on a 9-hour flight s/he will want to chat when you don't. Don't get started. You can nod or say a quiet "hi" but that's it. Don't ask where they're from, where or why they're going. You just don't care. This is me time, people. It's all about you.
2. If the person next to you persists in trying to be friendly, employ one of these strategies:
- Take out a book and pretend to read. Or you can really read, of course.
- Put on headphones.
- Take out a laptop
If the person overlooks any of these strategies or sees them for the farces they are (and this has happened to me), you DON'T SPEAK ENGLISH.
Or... you can't hear very well if at all. It's a last resort, but some people are annoyingly tenacious.
- For overnight flights to Europe, I highly recommend a glass or two of wine followed by a Sonata sleeping pill. What? We're here already? Geez. And I was just starting to enjoy the "me" time.
Ciao, y'all.
I don't know when I'll see you again. But I'm here. I'm trying.
Oh, hey. Before you go.
Any recommendations for inspirational tunes for my marathon playlist? Don't tell me Rocky theme music. It's corny and I already have it. Music to hype me up and kick my own butt? Warrior stance stuff? You can do it kind of tunes? Don't give up kind of stuff? Recommendations for your blog-absent friend?
thanks!

15 comments:

  1. Every now and then I fall off the blogging grid then find it very difficult to get back in the swing of posting and reading. Sort of like missing an episode of a show, I feel like I missed something and won't catch up.

    And as much as "me time" sounds wonderful, I don't envy your long flight. Jamaica is as far as I'll be traveling. And when did they start charging for blankets and pillows? And why can't they just give me the entire can of diet coke? I can handle it. I'm sure I'm a delight to travel with.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm really good at being unapproachable. Nobody thinks I'm a friendly stranger. This is good for me.

    Congrats on the house.

    I recommend a play list with heavy dose of 1970s-80s arena rock: Journey (Don't Stop Believin, duh), Bon Jovi (Living on a Prayer), Van Halen (Panama) ... these songs work! (I don't run with music.)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ive missed you!! I agree with you on the plane ride. Its best not to even make eye contact. That way they think that you are an unfriendlly sort. I dont like people, and being that far up off the ground in cramped quarters with recycled air doesnt make me like them any better.:)

    Have a safe flight...I loved Germany. Have some good German food for me.

    On the music...Im at a loss right now..the only thing that came to mind was (cringing) the theme to Chariots of Fire...like you havent HEARD that before right?

    I dunno some good fast paced punk rock that is also amusing is always fun...try the Ramones, they motivate me.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Dream house!? Very exciting. Moves are always hectic but with everything else going on it sounds like your life may be a little too full for blogging these days. I hope to see you back around when things calm down.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Whoa!!
    Please do a post on the dream house asap! (I'm soooooo nosy!) Life is crazy and you do have a good strategy for your flight.

    I did a post about my running music. It keeps me going (and I don't like to run.)
    http://viv-spot.blogspot.com/2009/04/i-do-what-ipod-tells-me.html
    :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hey, Stranger! I've been somewhat absentee as well. It's the time of year. Congrats on your dream house. I don't envy you the work.

    I used to travel a bit for work (Hello, Me Time!) and employed many of these strategies. I generally kept it to polite smiles and mono-syllabic answers.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Congrats on your new house! Your post exhausted me, though. I think I need a nap. Forget training (at least for today)!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Oh...I left you an award on my blog too:)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Ill tell you what, i have most recently gotten into Kings of Leon. I think they have a great beat. Also you can check out Boys Like Girls, All American Rejects, 3 OH! 3, Fall Out Boy, and Miley Cyrus. (Hey that latest one she has out is good!)

    ReplyDelete
  10. That's awesome you bought a new house! I enjoyed reading your post! There was so much going on it made ME feel tired! Your marathon is SO close! YAAYYY! And i'm not sure we have the same taste in running music! I'm more of the hip-hop type when it comes to running songs even though they have NOTHING to do with motivation usually. And i'm not really into Metallica, but they played 'Enter Sandman' when I was at a Wake Forest and Virginia Tech football game and it really got the crowd pumped! It had a good beat so you could try it! Not to sure it's motivating though. :) Glad things are going well, have a safe time in Germany and pray for the empty seat next to you!

    ReplyDelete
  11. It's good to have you back! In celebration, I've given you the "Over the Top Award" at my blog http://www.VaudevilleRose.com

    Don't worry, though, if you don't have time, you don't need to do the whole award thingy. Just know you're appreciated.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Van Halen always works for me. Start with "Right Now" and go from there.

    Glad to see you're still around! We missed ya!

    ReplyDelete
  13. I have tons of music ideas. So I'll have to email you some of 'em. The sheer paucity of music suggestions will astonish you.

    There is something special about me because no one ever tries to talk to me on airplanes. I must give off some good friendly vibes. Or odor.

    Pictures of dream house. yes yes.

    I have a friend who is running in Boston. Maybe I could hook you two up. I could live vicariously somehow. I haven't figured out the details.

    I'm so 'cited your back!

    ReplyDelete
  14. New house! Full time job! 3 boys! It's a wonder you ever blogged at all. I for one am glad you find the time!

    Safe travels!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Congrats on the new house. Moving is certainly a good reason -- better than any I've ever had -- to be a poor blogger.

    ReplyDelete

Please feel free to let me know what you think - especially if you like it. If not, please reconsider (just kidding!) I can take constructive criticism! Really I can...